Who knew a divorce would change my life so drastically?
The house felt so empty now. No more sounds of my dad making food in the middle of the night. No more waking up to my mom blasting her Gospel music. The once beautifully decorated walls filled with memories were now blank. The beautiful wedding pictures, the family outing albums...gone. The millions of my father's degrees...gone.
Of course I woke up to an empty house this morning, no different then any other morning after the divorce. The lunch money accompanied with the usual note "for Magi...from Papi"—wasn't there. "You know honey, I took on a few more shifts at work just so we can stay on our feet. Try and start saving your money, you know I won't be able to give you lunch money everyday like your father did." Quickly pushing my mother's voice out of my head, I grabbed my purse and went to school.
"I hate Thursdays," I said flipping through my Physics notebook. Overhearing my comment, Amanda replied, "I know right. It's so0o close to Friday but not really. And my parents always go out for dinner on Fridays leaving me all by myself. They're home all the time, I can’t stand it. I can't wait till tomorrow!"
"I definitely don't remember asking you" I said mumbling under my breath.
'Leaving me all by myself'...wow. Being alone in the house drives me insane. Mom has to work more often so we don't lose the house. Papi moved out a few weeks ago and has never stepped foot back here. How can being left alone be so great? I would give anything to have my parents home all the time.
The rest of the school day got worse.
“Any intentions?”
“My parents ‘cause they just bought me a new car!!”
“It’s my parents’ anniversary today.”
I could have sworn I missed the memo that it was "talk about my parents day".
The 2:21 bell rings. Volleyball time! the only thing that's been getting my mind off of the divorce. After getting subbed out in the second set and going back in just a few minutes later, I looked out into the bleachers. Seeing all the parents there cheering and giving words of encouragement to their daughters got to me. Why can’t I have that? "Macda, what the hell, the ball was right in front of you," said Smarthine with aggravation. "I know, I'm sorry. It won't happen again."
But it did. I kept missing passes, missing serves, and bumping into my teammates. My mind wasn't on that game at all. I kept thinking of going home to an empty house, knowing that my father wouldn't be waiting for me with chicken teriyaki like he always had on Thursday nights.
Why can't things go back to the way they were? When I'd hear my parents play fighting about who would take a shower first. Or the surprise anniversary, birthday, and Mother's Day gifts my dad always seemed to have planned at least four months in advance. Or even my mom cracking jokes on my dad's beard—hilarious.
But it'll never be like that again.
No comments:
Post a Comment